Should you forgive those who have made mistakes? It is a good question because it makes you think about what your friends and family have done to you in the past and you think about whether you have forgiven them or not. I personally do not like the idea of forgiving people because once someone messes up, they will do it again and again so to forgive them would be like stabbing your own body twice in the back. I hate how people say those who do not forgive are cold hearted because we are not. It is called being wise.
My version of a famous quote goes like this, "You lie to me once, shame on you. You lie to me twice, shame on me." The quote means that once someone lies to you, shame on them because it was an act of stupidity on their part. If they lie to you another time, shame on you. The second part is "shame on me" because that would mean you would have forgiven who ever it was again and as I said before, they repeated themeselves. The whole point of this blog post is to talk about liars and people telling you all the wrong things. So here I go.
I cannot stand when my friends and family tell me all the wrong secrets. They tell me things that will piss me off but when it comes to things I need to know so that I can be happy, they decide to hold it off until there is no point in me knowing what it was. It annoys me at how people can come up to me and say things such as, "Did you hear that so and so hate you" , "Oh, so the other day, I was standing by the steps and I heard X saying that you were hella annoying and that you are so full of yourself" or "I was standing over there and I saw so and so looking at you up and down. I think they hate you the most". However, when it comes to teling me things that would make me happy and things that could possibly change the rest of my freshman year, people decide not to tell me those things. Instead, they leave it off and when they are sure that I can do nothing about it, they decide it is the correct time to tell me.
That is the point in time where I decide that I will not forgive anyone at all for any reason because no one deserves to be forgiven. It is not like I have never done anything wrong and I do not expect anything from anyone so people not forgiving me makes no difference to me. Yeah of course, if it were a good friend I would be upset at the fact that they wouldn't have forgiven me but hell no I would not have made an effort to make it better. People not forgiving me is nothing at all, it just shows that people are smart and know better that to forgive me for what I did wrong.
People have always said I was wrong for thinking the way I do but no one has thought of it this way. The ones who do you wrong waste time. They waste your precious time, time that could have been used for something else. Time that can never be replaced and of course you only live once so you can never ever make up for even a second of it. So yes, I believe I have made my point and remember, for those who are close to me, if you mess up, there is a 99.9% chance that I will never forgive you and nor will I ever forget what you did. When I look at you, I will not be thinking about memories, I will be thinking about what you did to me. But of course I have told all of my friends this so this should be nothing new.
There's a lot I love about this one...particularly the paragraph about being told the WRONG secrets, and having the RIGHT ones withheld until the wrong moment. I thought that was perceptive--I even read it to Sherene (that's my wife) and she thought you nailed it too.
ReplyDeleteWhat makes me sad is the conclusion you draw, that forgiveness is dumb. Because it seems to me that WITHOUT forgiveness, we keep perpetuating the battles we have with other people and with ourselves, sometimes (usually) over stuff that is not worth bothering oneself over, in the grand scheme of things.
But that's just my two cents.